Interview with The Green Yamo from Bruce Lee

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PeteProdge
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Interview with The Green Yamo from Bruce Lee

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Good evening and welcome to another interview with a ZX Spectrum character, one which was requested by Ralf on my interview with a Curse Of Sherwood skeleton.

Image

Thanks to Ralf's interest, I've had a call from 'the big-headed baddie' from Bruce Lee, who is formally known as The Green Yamo. He joins us now.

The Green Yamo: It's wonderful to be here, I really enjoyed being on the Spectrum out of all the formats!

Ha, I bet you say that to the other guys too!

The Green Yamo: No, seriously, it's the Speccy and the Apple II that are my favourite gigs, as I don't have spend hours smearing green greasepaint all over myself.

Well I didn't realise that.

The Green Yamo: You live and learn. It's the PC-88 that's the utter nightmare. I get accused of being racist. It's best not to go into that. I'm quite at home on the Spectrum where I'm more myself, although at least on the BBC Micro I was a lot slimmer.

I suppose I better ask how you got into this role.

The Green Yamo: Well, I was originally down for Karate Champ, but Data East took one look at my, uh, less than conventional size, and let's just say there was a 'size zero' culture there, okay?

So you moved onto Bruce Lee?

The Green Yamo: Well it wasn't the plan. I had enough savings to wait it out for 1985's Yie Ar Kung Fu, where I had my heart set on being a formidable baddie. But you know what, Datasoft were the first to call and I was impatient in those days. I said 'yes' immediately. Rather foolish if you think about it.

Why, what's wrong with being in Bruce Lee?

The Green Yamo: Well, it's such an easy game, and I'm such a pushover in it. I didn't see it being that prolific a title, yet it became massive, and sadly, I have this stigma of being rather weak. Nobody at Konami would return my calls after that, I had no chance of getting near the Yie Ar Kung Fu dojo, and as for Way Of The Exploding Fist, forget it.

Well I'm sure you're remembered fondly here.

The Green Yamo: Yes, but only as the guy anyone can knock down. The one consolation is that I'm better at climbing than that primadonna midget.

Oh, your co-star, the ninja. I sense there's some animosity there?

The Green Yamo: Well that stuck-up cretin has about as much talent as he has height. He was the one to insist on entering each screen before me.
Plus he got the stick.


It's a shame to hear you didn't have the nicest of times.

The Green Yamo: Nicest of times!? Pah! I thought it was obvious from the way we all had to act like the most docile and inept opponents ever seen on screen. Well, until those ones in Golden Axe where you can lead them off a platform edge into oblivion.

Hmm, I guess we can't all be Double Dragon's Abobo.

The Green Yamo: I did actually do his stunts in the film version of that, you know.

Ah, after the badly managed steroid injection?

The Green Yamo: Well, quite.

Now, you must have had some pleasure being in the Bruce Lee game.

The Green Yamo: Yeah, a few supermarket openings, the odd appearance on a kid's Saturday morning programme, but, you know, from cheeky kids trying to kick you down as you cut a ribbon or end up covered in gunge from a rigged phone vote, I don't find fame to be that much of a reward.

Did you do anything else since Bruce Lee?

The Green Yamo: Well, I was asked to be in party political broadcasts for the Green Party, but my politics, are, shall we say, a little too right wing for their tastes.

Oh, well, let's not make this political.

The Green Yamo: Huhuh, yeah, we don't want to upset the liberal snowf...

Er, I think we should move on.

The Green Yamo: You get all these whiners slagging off Donald Trump, but they're...

Um, moving back to gaming.

The Green Yamo: Yes?

How painful were the... er... what did come out of those floor buttons? Was it some kind of huge fire?

The Green Yamo: Yes! But in actuality, it never affected me, because the gas jets were positioned in front of us, so it only LOOKS to the audience like we're getting a load of flames all over us. Mind you, I did used to nudge that bloody ninja into it if he was playing up, and he'd get a few singes.
Serves him right.


What about the moving floor blades?

The Green Yamo: Oh they were tricky, but, like the fire, positioned in a way that didn't actually harm us, it's the old stage magic. Hard to keep an eye on the floor and be in action at the same time.

Would you have liked Bruce Lee to have been a harder game?

The Green Yamo: Oh, no doubt. But Robocop was a smash hit and that was about as hard as tofu.

So I'm reckoning you're quite tough in real life then?

The Green Yamo: Yeah. Hard as nails, me.

Um, we do have some CCTV footage of you on the way here. You see...

The Green Yamo: Is this a set-up?

Well, anything can happen here, and we employed a little girl to...

The Green Yamo: I'm not having any of this. *takes off mic*

...give you a Chinese burn! It's funny stuff, people! Where's he gone?

The Green Yamo: *exiting across studio* You're pathetic amateurs. This is a scandal

Oh, he's being a bad sport. Anyway, we've got this clip where this girl, posing as an autograph hunter...

The Green Yamo: *shouting from the exit* You show that and I'll sue!

Erm... well... that didn't go the way I'd have liked it to. Er... should we show the clip?

...

I'm being told we can't.

Well, that's all from me and The Green... well, he's not here. I'll see you next time for another interview. Bye!
Reheated Pixels - a combination of retrogaming, comedy and factual musing, is here!
New video: Nine ZX Spectrum magazine controversies - How Crash, Your Sinclair and Sinclair User managed to offend the world!
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Juan F. Ramirez
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Re: Interview with The Green Yamo from Bruce Lee

Post by Juan F. Ramirez »

Thanks for the interview!

... and I'm Juan, not Ralf :roll:

:lol:
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Re: Interview with The Green Yamo from Bruce Lee

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Juan F. Ramirez wrote: Sun Nov 19, 2017 7:50 pm Thanks for the interview!
... and I'm Juan, not Ralf :roll:
Oh, er, I'm not even sure how I made that mistake. It's been a long day. Sorry!
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Re: Interview with The Green Yamo from Bruce Lee

Post by Wall_Axe »

he coulda been in yie ar kung fu and woulda fit right in :D
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Re: Interview with The Green Yamo from Bruce Lee

Post by Juan F. Ramirez »

[mention]PeteProdge[/mention] : A suggestion for a new interview: The maniac janitor from Mikie.
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Re: Interview with The Green Yamo from Bruce Lee

Post by PeteProdge »

Juan F. Ramirez wrote: Tue Mar 27, 2018 12:53 pm @PeteProdge : A suggestion for a new interview: The maniac janitor from Mikie.
Oh, when I got a spare bit of time - which could be about May judging by the rate I'm at!
Reheated Pixels - a combination of retrogaming, comedy and factual musing, is here!
New video: Nine ZX Spectrum magazine controversies - How Crash, Your Sinclair and Sinclair User managed to offend the world!
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