Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

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PeteProdge
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Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by PeteProdge »

If you were including ZX Spectrum pubs in The Good Pub Guide, what reviews would you give them? Here's a couple I came up with (back in 2014 on That Other ZX Spectrum Forum)...

The pub, 180
Well stocked with spirits, yet has only one beer pump. The barmaid has lightning-fast skills in sliding full pints down the bar to punters, without spilling a drop.
The pub's main income must surely derive from the popular leisure facilities, of which darts is a major focus. Regulars Desmond, Sidney, Dave, Larry, Bill, Mick, Tel and Jim take part in tournaments, all attired in the same clothing.
Unfortunately, dogs are allowed and the bar is occasionally home to a rather badly behaved spaniel who takes delight in marking his territory. Clearly, hygiene is not a priority in this otherwise commendable pub.

The Ship, Target: Renegade
Located in an unsavoury part of town, with baseball-capped youths and feral pitbulls running amock, this review took place under extreme duress.
Upon opening the big scarlet door to enter The Ship (and I wonder if that's the same pub name-checked in Underworld's 1996 opus, Born Slippy) I was confronted by an aggressive middle-aged skinhead. I'm not the fighting type, but he clearly wanted a ruckus and, in self-defence, I managed to lay him out cold.
Of course my main priority is to review this pub and not to dwell on the considerable social disorder. The interior is very spacious, decked with green carpet and a 1950s-style jukebox. A huge framed platinum disk sits on the wall, so one must assume the landlord may have been in the record industry at some point, maybe even a singer. Unfortunately I did not get to see the details close up, as I was accosted by several other violent skinheads, some of whom were wielding pool cues.
The pub is heavily stocked with spirits of various types. Pumps are nowhere to be seen, although one presumes hard liquor is the drink of choice among regulars here. Not wishing to cast aspersions, but drink-fuelled mayhem seems to be the order of the day here. This really isn't the place for a sociology lecture, but inner city deprivation appears to play a part.
After tackling the folically-challenged regulars, I retired to the Games Room. A nicely furnished area, with a couple of pool tables and a dartboard. Bizarrely, some novelty version of pool is preferred here, with many balls being green. The jukebox here is a CD multi-changer, a nod to a more modern age.
Sadly, my time here was cut short as I was repeatedly headbutted by a muscular fellow who appears to be a well-feared character. I was taken to A&E and am still in recovery after this fateful visit.
In conclusion, I can say that the venue itself is very roomy and entertainment is fairly well catered for, but I cannot ignore the anti-social violence that was dished out to me on my visit. For this reason, I warn you to steer clear.

Now it's your turn...
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Juan F. Ramirez
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Juan F. Ramirez »

Tapper, the Pub

We have definitely here a case of labour exploitation of the staff who works in this pub. In fact, only one barman must serve and pick up the beer jars the people demand.

After many union claims, the labour authority will open an inquiry.

Sometimes, the barman often suffers humiliations for the clients, as shown below.

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Besides, the only cola drink they serve is Pepsi. Tsk, tsk!

In the positive side, the pub offers a wide variety of craft beers. Recommended. It's got a Tripadvisor seal of quality.
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Ivanzx »

Pub Games, anybody? :P
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Daren »

The Red Lion, Everyone's A Wally

Devoid of humans, and haunted by lethal tankards which slide up and down the bar. Avoid at all costs!

TripAdvisor Rating: 2

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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Juan F. Ramirez »

Dorry's Tavern. Kingston Falls, CA

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Beyond this discreet facade, this tavern include a very interesting selection of craft beers. The staff is nice and professional (the viewing of the film Coyote Ugly is obligatory by the staff before the contract). It got three Beer Connoisseur magazine awards and a Tripadvisor seal of quality.

But the problem is the clientele. Certain weird urban tribe frequents this tavern: Violent, hoolingans, even exhibitionists make the tavern impossible to visit after midnight.

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The cause is they're the kind of people that shouldn't be watered after that time (12:00 p.m.) but they did. A waiter once had the stupid idea of watering the crowd with a hose while crying 'PAAAARTY, YEAAAH!!!' and people started to erm... became different.

Obviously the waiter was fired.

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So the best time to visit the tavern is midday, definitely.
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Juan F. Ramirez »

Le Café du Trashonnaire
48 rue de Travelier, Champs Elysee, Paris (pronnounced /Pa-guee/)

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There's a pavement cafe in the Champs Elysee, in Paris (pronnounced /Pa-guee/), France, a lovely place to enjoy a good croissant avec fromage et jambon with a café au lait while watching the amazing view of the city of light.

The Café has a big menu with a lot of french delicatessen, but I was surprised when I read that that day's special was grilled frogs. 'Bleeeurgh!!!' I said,' I chose the worst day to visit the café!' (and it reminded me of my last travel to Spain, where people enjoy eating snails -again 'Bleeeurgh!!!'-, but I'll tell you this in a future review).

The place consists of a big terrace with tables and colourful umbrellas. By the time I was writing this review the Café was absolutely crowded. And everyone chose frogs to eat. Lovely waitresses serving that abomination from here to there. And then I noticed a young man (I knew later that was a british guy) whose job was to catch alive frogs that escaped from the kitchen. Dozens of frogs eveywhere. And the poor guy chasing them and trying to catch them whilst avoiding the waitresses. He seemed he was under stress. I even thought he was a mentally disturbed person just escaped from a mental hospital.

At certain moment I asked him for his job and he told me that he had worked as a trashman in a little town in the UK. He was so efficient that he was awarded a Diploma of Trashmanship, which entitled him to go forth and rid the world of trash. "A mentally disturbed guy, as I've just suspected", I said to me. He also told me that he was been working in Paris for only a week. The week before he worked in Madrid, Spain, and his work was in a bullfighting ring, picking up roses the people throwed to the bullfighter while avoiding a bull. And the next week he was travelling to München, Germany, where he had to clear away the empty beer jars in the Oktoberfest. He went on telling me about Hong Kong, USA,... and suddenly the Chef cried to him 'stop speaking, the forgs are escaping!!!'.

I finished my croissant avec fromage et jambon and my café au lait, paid the bill and went down the streets thinking about that poor guy.

Back to the review, If there weren't frogs in the menu, I'd give 5/5 to this Café, but the frogs and the labour conditions reduce the score to 1/5.
Last edited by Juan F. Ramirez on Fri Jun 21, 2019 12:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Vampyre »

I've never actually played these but presumably:

Pi-Eyed
Andy Capp

I think the object of both of those games was to get bladdered...
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druellan
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by druellan »

Mugsy's bar scene.

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Loved those small animated sequences back in the day, even when you must watch them a hundred of times.
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zxbruno
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by zxbruno »

Don't know if it fits the theme. The bar in Paradise Cafe? Can't think of words for a review though.
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Morkin »

Trashman

Lansdown Road.

The pub's name is in doubt as the sign seems to have been vandalised. Perhaps it's this one.

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Bob Wurzle the landlord:

"...Now I've always said workin' men are welcome 'ere, we get a few posties poppin' in for a pint of Smiles or two after their shift. But this fella, he's bangin' on the door demandin' we open early, says he's on the clock and not got the time to wait aroun'.

Well, no sooner have I lets 'im in, he downs two Holsten Pills, a Babycham and seven shots of Pernod, and he's reelin' around everywhere. Naturally I ask 'im to leave and he starts getting all shirty, stumbles out the door and starts tramplin' all over me newly mowed lawn. Worse 'n that even, he trips over poor little Molly, sleepin' outside, the most gentle pub dog you could find, she barks at 'im and he turns round and bites 'er leg... So now I've gotta take 'er to the vets for a rabies shot..."
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by toot_toot »

There were a couple games set in the town that I grew up in, Dundee, Scotland, that featured LOTS of pubs.

Pub Crawl

https://spectrumcomputing.co.uk/index.p ... 6&id=10089

This was a text adventure where (from memory) the goal was to eventually have sex with a woman while going around various pubs in Dundee. I had a pirated copy of this when I was young and unfortunately it seems to be Missing in Action, which is a real shame. As a 12 year old it seemed very raunchy and quite cool being able to walk around Dundee while getting drunk. I'd love to play it again, but there seems to be absolutely no trace of it!


Pub Crawl II

https://spectrumcomputing.co.uk/index.p ... 6&id=10088

I didn't play this until years later via emulation, but this is basically more like a "role playing game" version of it - that is it's basically the same game as Pub Crawl but you actually control your character walking around Dundee. While it's a bit more playable, it loses some of the charm by not having any descriptive text.

Thankfully this isn't MIA!

If anyone has the original Pub Crawl, then please, please, please upload it so I can revisit those memories!!
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Fahnn »

toot_toot wrote: Sat Aug 03, 2019 11:29 am There were a couple games set in the town that I grew up in, Dundee, Scotland, that featured LOTS of pubs.

Pub Crawl...
No idea that these existed. What a find!

I went to university in Dundee from 1989-1993 and - being a feckless student - spent a lot of time in a lot of pubs. So I had to play the one that is available (Pub Crawl 2).

There's a lot in there that I remember but there's a lot missing. I used to share a flat on Meadowside immediately above Foreigners (well, three floors up), which is featured in the game. Foreigners (it's called Conroys Bar now) was a biker pub. There used to be a band that played there a lot called the Beaver Sisters, they did a lot of Wayne/Jayne County and Rocky Horror Show stuff, they were a lot of fun. But the game just stereotypes it...badly.

Across the road was an absolutely cavernous place that we'd often go to, too (looking on Google Maps, it seems to have been made into flats now). I must admit that I can't remember what it was called but it was a great place. Often we'd go in at eight or nine at night and be the only people in there (well, alongside the barman). Really quite eerie. But not included in the game.

The next year, we moved around the corner into a flat on Panmure Street above the Ladbrokes. Lots of pubs around there. Caw's (not in the game) was directly opposite but our favourite was The Old Bank which was about 50 yards diagonally away. The streets are in the game, but the pubs on them aren't. It's as though the pubs included are pretty much random.

Lots of others missing. I'm most put out by there being no West Port Bar, where I played in 1991 with my band (at the time) Valium Groove Train to universal critical acclaim (I may well be exaggerating or misremembering here for comic effect, but we had fun).

As for the game, yeah, it's not good. I'm being kind there. It's absolutely awful. REALLY poor. Pretty much any text you enter gets the same response and the "arcade" bits are similarly predictable.

This might actually be the worst game I've ever played and I've played Jack & The Beanstalk.
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Juan F. Ramirez »

The German Canteen
Somewhere in south Germany.

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Sometimes is hard to be a pub reviewer. This is one example.

I don't know how, but some time ago I happened to arrive to a castle in south Germany where I discovered there was what it seemed to be an interesting pub.

First of all, the place was dirty and sinister. I waited in a queue and when it was my turn I asked for the typical german grilled knuckle and thuringian sausages, and a bottle of glühwein vine (I had always wanted to try that german delicatessen), but the chef (very dirty, by the way) stared at me in a weird way and served me some porridge and a glass of water.

Obviously I asked for the complaints book and then, a guy with a black uniform (who everybody called him the Commandant) cried to me: "COOLER!".

Now I'm in a little isolation cell, playing with a baseball ball all day.

But somebody in the next cell told me that a group of people were planning to dig a tunnel to escape...
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by malczx »

Always liked spending time in the Cregley Arms in Inspector Flukeit, for the atmosphere.

https://youtu.be/Xk8RKGziJ1I?t=5557
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Lee Bee »

I found this lovely old thread and wanted to add some more content! :dance :dance :dance

(1/3) First, some images of games suggested earlier in the thread which didn't have images…

180!
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Target: Renegade
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Pi-Eyed
Image

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Paradise Cafe
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Lee Bee
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Lee Bee »

(2/3) I also wanted to bring in some entries (and add images) from the similar older pub thread…

Minder: The Winchester Club:
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vanpeebles wrote: Mon Dec 06, 2021 9:09 am The Winchester Club! Perfect place to buy blue peter presenters, tins of warts and rubber wet suits, or get found out for selling dodgy tellys.
The Bull & Bush (Tiddly Drinks):
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equinox wrote: Sun Dec 05, 2021 2:37 pm
This place purports to be a family pub, but they don't serve food and when I popped in on Christmas Eve 1987 I was appalled at the loutish behaviour. A large-nosed fellow in a cap was rather too "tiddly" and repeatedly hurled his empties into the air. One of them almost hit a dog, which I'm told was the man's own. No interest at all from the bar staff, though they were happy enough to keep serving him.

The Bull & Bush does have a rather battered juke box (left-hand end of the bar, near the portrait of Her Majesty) but don't waste your money: during my visit, there was a chap at the piano who wouldn't stop bashing out his favourites. To be fair, he played quite well in three channels, and somehow managed some percussion too.

Decor is generally rather dire, depressing and monochrome; you can tell they've tried to liven the place up for Christmas with a few balloons, but these clash horribly with everything else.

On the up side, service is extremely quick, with up to six pints served in seconds -- despite the unremitting presence of three bar-flies who barely moved from the mahogany all night. And don't get me started on that loser playing darts on his own in the corner.

1 out of 4 stars
Mindstone:
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bluespikey wrote: Tue Dec 14, 2021 1:29 pm The Bar In Kranos

A lovely country pub, far from anywhere and about half way through your journey. Its so far from anywhere that we don't recognise your coinage. In fact we don't recognise any coinage. So please just ask for a drink and then ask for another. And another. Max out your strength whilst you are at it. The builders of the pub probably didn't realise their error, but its not like you care. It certainly makes the second half of your journey much easier.

Avoid the bars in Elantor and Carakot though. You have to pay in them.
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Lee Bee »

(3/3) And finally, some I found myself…

Pub Games:
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Brunilda:
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Mighty Final Fight:
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Puzzled:
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Alas, the Spectrum version of Viz didn't feature all the bonus games, such as this from the C64:
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Dr beep »

worldbar aka cafe international
Both boardgame and arcade version
https://spectrumcomputing.co.uk/entry/2 ... de_version

Review:
Too popular chances on a seat are small.
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by Stefan »

ZX Larry!
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Great art, great conversations, toilets are a bit scummy and the upstairs, well the upstairs...
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by bluespikey »

No mention of JSW, even if its an off license rather than a pub. Looks like a pub.

Eastenders apparently has a mini game of serving drinks in the Queen Vic. But I've not played it.
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by clebin »

Image

Wouldn't it be lovely to wile away a summer's afternoon crawling the many thatched, stone and Tudor framed pubs of Firelord? I bet they have some great beer gardens too. A big problem would be finding my way home again. I don't think I'll be asking these folk for directions.
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Re: Pubs in ZX Spectrum games

Post by equinox »

clebin wrote: Tue Mar 21, 2023 11:35 am Wouldn't it be lovely to wile away a summer's afternoon crawling the many thatched, stone and Tudor framed pubs of Firelord? I bet they have some great beer gardens too. A big problem would be finding my way home again. I don't think I'll be asking these folk for directions.
For a filling end-of-the-night snack, pick up one of the many baguettes or broccoli stalks littering the streets.

I found a quick way home through a knight's castle but he wanted loads of money. Basically the mediaeval version of a taxi.
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