ZX Limericks

[R-Tape]

There was a young man from Caerphilly
Who played Spectrum till demented & silly
He said: I can get to the attic
But my progress becomes static
I'm starting to hate Jet Set Willy!

...

[MatGubbins]

There was a young lad named Paul
Who thought he was rather cool
But he got in a muddle
When he dived in a puddle
And now he's called Hydrofool

[R-Tape]

“Paul” and “cool” might rhyme if a Geordie says it, not sure otherwise! Nay John Pool?

[Joefish]

Says Mr. too-many-syllables-for-a-limerick...

[R-Tape]

Says Mr. too-many-syllables-for-a-limerick...

Which line/s?

I wanted to say Jet Set ****ing Willy somewhere in the last line but it sounded too long!

[Einar Saukas]

A man from Caerphilly
Playing Spectrum, so silly!
He went to the attic
But then got static...
Now hates f**ing Willy!

[R-Tape]

Nice! On the short side I think.

This is my understanding of the rules:

Lines 1,2,5 should rhyme and have a similar number of syllables, they can be longish.
Lines 3,4 should rhyme and have a similar number of syllables, these are often the shorter sentence.

[R-Tape]

There was a young lady from Gwennap
Who had problems changing WAV to TAP
She moved the azimuth a smidge
The screen said "Bytes: SQIJ"
She said "what is this pile of horsecrap?!"

[Juan F. Ramirez]

The same guy from Caerphilly
after completing Jet Set Willy
decided to play Stonkers
'this man is really bonkers!'
said a nurse born in Chile

[Joefish]

This is my understanding of the rules:
Lines 1,2,5 should rhyme and have a similar number of syllables, they can be longish.
Lines 3,4 should rhyme and have a similar number of syllables, these are often the shorter sentence.

Lines 1,2 and 5 should have identical numbers of syllables, typically 3 repetitions of 3 beats. If you chuck in one or two extra trivial beats at the end of each line (or miss off the first one) you have to do it for all the lines in that set, or it gets too messy to recite.

Lines 3 and 4 should also have identical numbers of syllables, typically 2 repetitions of 3 beats. Again if there's one more or less, both lines still need to match.

You also get an emphasis on the third beat of each set of three, which can sound weird if it falls in an unnatural place in a longer word.

https://whvvugt.home.xs4all.nl/Archives ... cture.html

So you can't have 9 syllables in your first line, then 11 in the second.
Note where the major beats fall, every third syllable:

On the norks of a barmaid from Hale
Were tatooed all the prices of ale.
And upon her behind
(For the sake of the blind)
Were those very same prices...

Spoiler

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . in braille.

Not very Speccy I'll admit, but I doubt Uncle Clive would disapprove, given his history...

It's not easy to write successive lines where the rhythm works in exactly the same pattern for the different words. Which is why it takes time and a lot of effort to get it right.

[Nomad]

Limericks



Ok I admit it I tried 3 different times and I still can't get a good ditty I am just salty.

[Joefish]

Definitely.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iV8_pSrAxgc

[MatGubbins]

Anyone want to write the first line for this one?

- here -
"I'm gonna get rat-arsed", he hissed.
After ten pints of Cobra,
he was no longer sober,
in fact he was remarkably Pssst!

[Joefish]

No, but I'll swap the word 'remarkably' for 'markedly' for you, so it scans!

[Kweepa]

I once met a man on craigslist?
You have to work the emphasis.

Alternatively:
I once met a man from Cerist
https://www.gazetteer.org.uk/search.php ... t&pageno=2

Or:
I once met a computerist

[Kweepa]

I once met a man called Sinclair
Who was freaked about losing his hair
He jumped in his C5
And screamed from the A5
"You can't see my bald spot from there"

[R-Tape]

I like Craigslist!

I'm annoyed about my two because I spent a good 20 - 30 mins on each, and it turns out neither is technically a limerick! Must try harder this weekend.

[Kweepa]

Quick rebalance:

There was a young man from Caerphilly
Who played Spectrum till manic & silly
He said: I'm in the attic
But my game's become static
I'm starting to hate Jet Set Willy!

[Einar Saukas]

I'm annoyed about my two because I spent a good 20 - 30 mins on each, and it turns out neither is technically a limerick! Must try harder this weekend.

30 min on each rhyme?
My God, that's a crime!
Yet your poem failed shape...
Here's your problem, R-Tape:
Too much free time!

[Kweepa]

Quick rebalance:

You spent thirty minutes per rhyme?
By Jupiter, that is a crime!
Yet your poems failed shape
Here's your problem, R-Tape
You've got way too much bloody free time!

I'll get me coat.

[MatGubbins]

Whatever happened to EdgeGrinder?

[R-Tape]

Whatever happened to EdgeGrinder?

My muse, I just struggled to find her
So far it has sprites
And plenty spare bytes
So sod off you great saucy binder!

(Sprites, collisions, shooting, grind detection but I tired of it. It will emerge sometime but probably as a new shooter rather than edge grinder, I can still use your intro )

[MatGubbins]

Whatever happened to EdgeGrinder?

My muse, I just struggled to find her
So far it has sprites
And plenty spare bytes
So sod off you great saucy binder!

(Sprites, collisions, shooting, grind detection but I tired of it. It will emerge sometime but probably as a new shooter rather than edge grinder, I can still use your intro )

Ta!

[Kweepa]

There once was a man called Dave Hughes
Who struggled to locate his muse
He began with sweet rhyming
Smooth syllable timing
But in the end didn't quite know which words to pick

[R-Tape]

There once was a man called Dave Hughes
Who struggled to locate his muse
He began with sweet rhyming
Smooth syllable timing
But in the end didn't quite know which words to pick

brilliant, perhaps "but he had to resort to booze".

Somehow reminds me of the big beard Limerick, in spirit at least.

There was an old man with a beard
A funny old man with a beard
He had a big beard
A great big old beard
That amusing old man with a beard