Reviews

Another awful game from Hi-Tec.

First, no Kempston Joystick support in 1990. Standard SuperB Hi-Tec Quality, I guess.

Second, redefining keys is broken, because you cannot choose any key that is used in menu (like "K"). Enjoy even more Hi-Tec quality.

And third, it is nigh impossible to hit anything with your peashooter called "laser", so the only option is to collide with an enemy, watch your energy drained, and then die.

The only redeeming quality of this game is its graphics: it is big and nice. Not up to 1990 standards, i'd say, but still nice and clean. If only Hi-Tec bothered to add the good game to this graphics...

Final score: 2, thanks to gfx. Too unplayable even for three pounds game.

U.N. Squadron by Tiertex (as in-game text claims).

Another arcade conversion. I never played the original arcade, so I don't know how faithful the conversion is, but as a Spectrum game it is quite poor. It is slow (I found it much better and more playable at 200% emulation speed), and the worst thing is that it is slow for nothing: the monochrome graphics is detailed, but sadly, you are unable to see enemies and bullets. And that ruins the game completely.

If only I'd be able to clearly distinguish the enemies and their bullets from the background...

So, it is 2.5, and I rounded it to 3. It could be much better if developers made graphics simplier and easier to see. But for now it is a monochrome pixel mess. Play it if you have nothing better to do, but be prepared to alot of unfair death.

This game doesn't have great graphics or sound, but don't let that disappoint you: it is surprisingly playable! To complete all screens, you will need both your brains, and your arcade skills. Carefully plan your route, watch for your timing, and you'll succeed.

The game is small and simple, but it definitely has "let's try one more time" magic.

Tried to play this. Redefined keys, chose "M" as "fire". Cannot start the game at all. Awful.

It was already reviewed by others, but i feel that i should do it too, because i think that this game is better than average. Yes, there is nothing special, we've seen this formula exploited to death, but i think that graphics style makes this game to stand out of the crowd.

Ok, the game itself is your usual "go there, take that, and bring it somewhere" thing. There are rooms with some flashing objects, and you have to find the corresponding non-flashing object, then place it at a flashing one. There are nasties, and your oxygen level is constantly decreasing (because you're underwater), but you can find some oxygen supplies around the ship. Who'd guess that ancient pirates had oxygen tanks from the future with them, and those tanks will survive for centuries, still fully functional? Another pirate mystery, i guess.

It sounds like a really boring task, but somehow the graphics makes it fun for me. It is more on a primitive side, but in the same time it is colorful and strangely atmospheric, even surreal sometimes. Try this game if you like to wander around in dream-like places, carrying random things with you.

Something around 3.8 for me, so let it be 4.

I never liked Jet Set Willy with its pixel-precise movements, it's simply not what I call "fun". But Brian Bloodaxe is something completely different! It doesn't have JSW "one touch and you're dead" difficulty, and you can even use your helmet to kill enemies! Your helmet also can "stick" to some platforms, which can be used to your advantage sometimes.

One of the best platformers I've ever played. Even slightly flickering sprites cannot make it annoying. Oh, and it has more interesting mechanics than mentioned here. Give it a try, and you may love it too! And don't afraid to experiment with the game, some "glitches" you may find are parts of the game design, and can help you alot.

And yes, it is beatable without "infinite lives" poke.

And no, there is no escape from Hell... almost.

Oooh... This could be a good game, but... But it is very, very bad one.

The idea with attribute scrolling could work, but, oh my, how come it implemented so terribly?! It is absolutely impossible to understand where you can fly, and where you can't. On top of that, the action hiccups when you shoot. Those two things turns the game into unplayable crap.

Good idea that deserves much better implementation. But this one... avoid at all costs!

Slow movement, hard to see sprites, boring gameplay. There is really nothing more to say, I already wrote more words than this game deserves.

A very average game by all means. At least on the first level, I don't know what next levels have to offer.

Your character cannot stop and turn around until it finishes its running animation cycle, so it is hard to avoid enemies: no matter how hard I pressed arrow keys, those... things always eating me.

Also, the playing area is almost fully filled, and your sprite is very hard to see. Making background graphics less solid would help, but...

So i tried several times, couldn't get past the first level, and stopped trying. Technically, the game works. But it lacks gameplay.

Another game with interesting idea and awful execution.

The idea is that the tiles on a playfiled have different effects on your ship, so you should choose carefully which ones to shoot. Only it is impossible to choose, because everything is looking the same, and moving so fast that you don't have enough time to think. In shmups you usually have to memorize enemy waves and patterns, but here you have to memorize every your movement and shot, otherwise you'll be dead in a two seconds.

If only you could control playfield movement, like in Xenon, for example... But you can't, and the game is unplayable.

A really fun strategic game. It's graphics is simplistic, and it is written in BASIC, but hey, do chess-like games really need shiny graphics? The troops are recognizable, and the game is very playable (and it even has built-in instructions).

What it really needs is a good AI to play against. I guess this is not what one can do with BASIC, though.

This is a fun game to play with your friend. As the playfield is randomly generated, replayability is quite high. And if you like this one, don't miss another game from the same author, Viking Riders.

I always loved how scenes are built in this game. It's slow, but somehow makes me feel more immersed. Dunno why.

Yet the game itself is quite boring. I really wish to have a deep non-linear adventure with good puzzles build on this engine (with the graphics of the same quality, i mean).

This could be a great shoot-em-up with a turn, but it turned out to be simply boring. The graphics is nice, but the gameplay is not. And it is not a shoot-em-up too.

P.S.: What I mean is that the game literally prays to have good action elements in it, with the main objective as a bonus task.

Extremely... boring.

This is not a game, this is a techdemo of what Nick&Dave could do with Spectrum. Graphics is huge and colorful, everything is moving, explosions are everywhere... But sadly, there is no good game there. The first level is ok (althrough I cannot get rid of the thought that the whole escort mission is there just to make the level last much longer than it should), but next two levels are not interesting to play at all. Still graphicslly impressive, yet they hardly contain any gameplay.

This thing sould be on a some magazine covertape, not sold for the full price.

It's good that we can play it for free now. Do it once to see the usual technical quality of Perry and Bruty works, but don't expect it to be a good game.

I'm going with "poor" rating, because 'cmon, tech demo should not be sold as a game, especially not as a full priced game.

Simple and fun game in the style of Makaimura. As with Makaimura, you don't have any air control, and that sux. Jumping is also slightly unresponsive, so it is hard (if possible at all) to play the game without memorizing. But at least there are no random enemies, so you can learn your way.

It is also possible to move slowly, and make a better progress with less dying, but it is less fun this way too.

If you don't like that type of games where you have to learn by dying, this is prolly not your cup of tea. But if you can enjoy such (slightly unfair) gameplay, give this a try.

My rating is somewhere around "3.6", so i rounded it to 4.

Not really bad Boulder Dash style game. In this game you can set bombs to blow boulders (like in Down to Earth). The game is colorful and animated, but i am slightly annoyed by screen scrolling: it is fast, but somewhat hard on eyes. Also, the controls are not really good: there is a slight delay between keypress and game response. This sometimes forces you to hold the key longer, and move by more than one tile, which can be fatal.

Nice-looking game with somewhat unresponsive controls. Definitely not bad, but i cannot rate it higher than "average". Sorry.

The game is so slow that it is almost unplayable. And the scrolling is awful.

The idea is interesting, tho: it is a mix of PC "Digger" game and Boulder Dash. If only the execution was slightly better...

Surprisingly playable and nice-looking Boulder Dash inspired game. It is somewhat slow, and therefore hard to control, but it's not completely ruining the game.

Nothing special, but nothing bad too. Yet another average Boulder Dash clone.

Yet another Boulder Dash clone. The action is limited to one screen without scrolling, and the graphics is very small, but the game is colorful and quite playable. No kempston joystick support, tho.

Average.

Another Boulder Dash clone with tiny graphics and no scrolling. It looks realy awful. You cannot see it on screenshots, but the diamonds are constandly changing the color, and there is needless animation in empty spaces. It is too distracting and hard on eyes.

Could be a good game, but the author seems to be too excited by animated things and colors.

Boulder Dash clone. Very small playing area, awful scrolling, the game is slow, and you can make it unwinable right at the first screen.

Poor game with bad design.

Interesting idea for split-screen Boulder Dash. Sadly, the playing area is very small, so it is really hard to navigate. Also, awful scrolling from the original Boulder Dash is preserved for some reason (i.e. you can run off the screen, and have to wait until the camera catch up).

Good idea, but poor game. I'm sad.

Yet another Boulder Dash clone, with veird graphics. This looks more like a puzzle game with less arcade element than in the original Boulder Dash.

It may work like a joke, but isn't really satisfuing to play. I'd better do two beers intead.

Boulder Dash, but with small graphics and without scrolling. Surprisingly playable, but nothing special. The ability to see the whole map is good, but small graphics is hard to look at.

Average Boulder Dash clone. Try it if you're a hardcore Boulder Dash fan.

The same crap as "Space Rider Jet Pack": no Kempston support, and key redifinition is broken (you cannot define any key that is used in the menu selection, like "K" or "J"). As i wasn't able to define controls, i couldn't played it. Sorry, it was an awful expirience.

I got this game when i was a kid, and spent alot of time wandering around. I didn't knew what to do, and I didn't even knew that i can "enter" the stations, so the only thing I was left with is destroying the mushrooms. So i though that it was a sophisticated mushroom collection simulator.

Anyway, the game is somewhat boring, but I still have some good memories about it, so… Average, i guess.

Oh, yeah, i later realised that i have to fix that broken machinery, and even found a way to get more replacement parts. But squashing mushrooms is still more fun.

Try it if you have nothing better to do, and feel yourself in the mood for exploring a big world. The game doesn't need fast reflexes, so you can walk around without being killed.

At first i didn't got what i have to do at all (in-game instructions would help a lot).

You have to destroy a big square with black blocky thing inside. To do this, you need to hit it with a pulse that is moving around. But default pulses are too short, so you have to make them longer first, by directing them to the big square with a ball. Basically, you're the bat, and you're playing "Pulsoids" (remember that game?), but this time losing a pulse is not fatal, and you can move your bat in all 4 directions.

This game is definitely not for those who love a quick action. You don't need good reflexes, but mostly good patience to play this. But i found this game strangely addictive with its slow, almost meditative pace. It's not your average arcade, the game is good in its own way.

The game is quite fun and fast, but it completely missed one of the key Arcanoid features — ball control.

In Arcanoid, you can use your paddle to deflect the ball at a different angle. With some practice, you will be able to make more-or-less "directed ball shots". But in Pulsoids, the pulse is always deflected at 90 degrees, there is no way to contol this. So, for me, the game feels… flat.

I'd like to rate it as bad, but everything else is ok, so it is 2.5, which rounds to average.

I always thought that Booty is very overrated game. And this is basically Booty with (lazily) changed graphics. I guess that JFC was asked by Bubble Bus to write some Booty sequel, and he made this game to satisfy them. I can't feel any passion behind Moonlight Madness.

If you want something like Booty, then go play Booty instead, it is much better game than this.

The only good thing about this game is smooth sprite movement. Everything else is below average.

The map is big, but it consists of empty rooms with no interesting objects in them.

The perspective is somewhat hard to become used to, and makes shooting enemy bots harder than it should be.

And nothing new really happens in this game, so there is no incentive to explore the map.

Competent programming, but they forgot to add an interesting game to that code.

Good "walk around the map" game for those who love such games. It looks like a budget clone of Dan Dare, but there is nothing wrong with that.

Controls are responsive, and you won't have movement problems. The only annoying thing is that you need to shoot a lot to kill any enemy. Go to TipShop, and use "one shot one kill" poke — the game is WAY more fun in this mode. It really should have built-in "easy/hard" selection for that.

Also, failing a valve means game over, so if you just want to walk around shooting ali… eh… deviants, use "auto valve" poke.

The map is quite big, but you have teleporter platforms for fast traveling. Discover them and write down their names, because you will need to type them to teleport.

After applying "one shot one kill" poke i found the game playable and fun, so the final rating is "good".

Yet Another Cybernoid Clone. Graphics is not that bad, but you have to shoot for ages to kill anybody. If you want something like this game, but more playable, go with Task Force instead: while Task Force graphics looks worser, that game is actually playable.

The final rating is 1.5 (0.5 for the graphics), so rounded to "poor".

Nice idea, spoiled by wrong controls. Not "bad controls", they're just wrong.

The only thing you can do is make the ball jump. And activate springs/splopes. And you get some damage hitting an obstacle. And there is no way to change the ball direction until it hits someting.

If only they add some way to actually control the ball speed… But there isn't, and the game is very boring expirience due to that.

There is a fun idea inside there, but the authors did their best to not allow you to have fun. Alas.

This game is almost OK… But alas.

It has fun big attribute explosions (it looks nice, and you really feel that you destroyed something important with your shots), the usual 48K "screeeeeek" sounds and such. The sprites are moving fast and nice…

But there's one thing that ruins the whole game: your ship. It moves by character positions, and it feels very unresponsive. A shame, because with slightly better ship movement that could be a nice little shooter, even worth a budget price tag.

Try it once to see those explosions, but don't expect to be hooked.

It looks like an older version of "Hyperplane +". So please, read my rewiew for "Hyperplane +" — this one has the same flaws. But it doesn't have fancy attribute explosions, so if you really want to play this, go with "Hyperplane +" instead.

Nice little horizontal scrolling shoot-em-up. The controls are responsive, and the speed is ok.

The only downside of this game is that there are too many enemies sometimes, and it's hard to avoid being hit. And one hit means death. If only authors add some kind of hitpoints…

This game is fast, with responsive controls, a lot of enemies, nice graphics… and it is bad.

It is bad, because it's very hard to see what is going on on the screen. While the sprites and the background are nicely drawn, they don't play well when overlayed. It's hard to see both you, and your enemies, and many of your deaths will be absolutely unfair.

If not that, the game could be "average", and fun.

Slow and monotonic horizontal shooter. Looks like cheap Ghosts-n-Goblins wannabe (zombies, graves, and you cannot change your direction in mid-jump). The ammo is limited, so you can't even have fun shooting. But at least it is possible to see what is going on on the screen.

Doesn't worth your attention, there are much better games in this genre out there.

I agree with other reviewers: this game is more a puzzle game than a platform arcade game.

Also, configure your emulator to 200% speed, it plays much better this way.

Don't forget to read the text on the title screen: there are some other weapons, you are not limited to arrows. Not thay you will need them, tho.

I don't like Operation Wolf, so i prolly should not review this… but anyway. The scrolling is smooth, and i had fun for several shooting sessions. Actually, i had more fun than with Operation Wolf, so "average".

But if you're The Real OpWolf Fan, you may not like it.

This is using the same engine as "LA Drugs Bust", but it's even better, because you have infinite ammo.

Also, shooting paparazzis is always fun.

Nothing special, just your average run-off-the-mill horizontal fighting game. But I can't say that i hadn't any fun with it: after getting used to controls you'll find that it is quite playable.

The main thing they could do better is checkpoint placement: you can drop a checkpoint crystal whenever you want, but it is often done when fighting, and then you're respawned without a chance to survive, right in front of some enemy.

Also, non-solid background could have less pixels, for better object visibility.

End bosses are totally uninspired, and more boring than fun.

But it is still a playable game. 2.8, so "average".

Couldn't make kempston interface work, and it wasn't any better with the keyboard. Maybe the game will start being fun after some time, but with such a bad initial impression it had no chance. Sorry.

I could never understand what is so fun in trying to break your joystick with the games like Match Day, or various "assault courses". But this one is even worser than others — no sound, dull graphics, nothing to make it stand out of the crowd.

Throw it to the dumpster bin.

Booooring. I found myself sleeping even before finishing the first map.

If you really want some monochrome sidescrolling action game, go try "Ninja Commando" instead (it's from Brian Cross too). That game is much harder, but it's more fun to play.

It is much better than "Bionic Ninja" from the same author. It's hard to control your jumps, so landing on the enemies is hit-and-miss, but hey, this game is at least playable! (and "Bionic Ninja" isn't.)

Ninja Commando is unfairly hard, but if you love unfair challenges (and black-and-white worlds), it may entertain you. At least it did so for me.

This game looks cheap, the movement is character-based, sound is minimalistic… but despite all that, the game is fun.

The game is unfair — there is almost no way to avoid loosing strength, and you won't even know you're hurt if you don't look at the status bar. Some sound would be nice.

Also, when you'll kill enough enemies, you will be rewarded with a bonus. You can choose what bonus you want (including energy and ammo), so it's not like you can't survive.

Cheap, but fun. Something around a solid "average" for me.

This is definitely inspired by "Into the Eagle's Nest" and "Alien Breed". The graphics is acceptable, and the whole thing could be fun… if it wasn't so slow.

It is hard to control your hero, and the game feels very unresponsive. Of course, you can eventually get used to it, but why? There are better games of this genre around.

Sorry, graphics alone can't bump this above "poor".

I really really want to love this game. It looks more-or-less good, it tries to be friendly when you're dying… And it's absolutely unenjoyable to play.

Inertia of your ball makes it feel like it's slowly floating in some kind of jello first, and then it suddenly becomes way too fast. This alone kills a lot of fun.

Each time I return to this game, I tried hard to love it, but I can't.

It's written in BASIC, and I like how it draws it's font. Everything else… not so much.

Awful review for an awful game.

This is Visitors from the Trash Bin. The graphics is awful (but the main hero is somewhat fun, and reminds me… oh, nevermind). And the gameplay is even worser: when the screen starts to scroll, everything slows down to a literal crawl.

It's bad, even way below "it's so bad that it's fun". Just bad.

Flying around in total silence, trying to understand what you have to do is not my definition of "fun".

This looks more like some "technical beta" that was given to the Q&A team to evaluate, then a finished game.

Welcome to the first and the only Eraser Tool Simulator!

Had you ever used a tile-based map editor, where you have to slowly move your coursor over the rows of tiles, keeping "action" button pressed to erase them? This is exactly what this game is.

It's a shame, really, because the scrolling is smooth, the game speed is OK, and it could be a decent shooter in the style of "Bosconian". But it isn't.

My first expirience with this game was on MSX, and i remember that it was slightly better there. But ZX version is very playable and addictive too.

The scrolling could be more smooth, sound effects could be slightly better, but hey, who cares? It's time to SHOOT THOSE ALIEN BASES DOWN!

Very addictive game, with the famous "oh, just one more try!" effect.

I really liked the graphical style, but the game is virtually unplayable due to broken controls. I mean, you HAVE to be pixel-perfect to fit into any vertical passage, and if you will press up or down in the wrong place, the hero will simply stop.

If only the author would allow the hero to move when two keys are pressed, and one of the directions is free…

It's not fun, it's frustrating. It's a shame, because with only a small fix it could be "average".

Devil's Descent, but with a slightly better graphics. Still, the best way to have any fun from this game is to avoid it altogether.

Pyjamarama clone from Neil Latarche of Airwolf 2 fame. Honestly, I expected much better game from him.

Metropolis is very slow to be playable. It may be a good arcade adventure, but I cannot know it, because I felt asleep before I reached the third room.

The graphics doesn't look bad (but nothing spectacular too), but sometimes there are too many enemies on the screen, and slow movement is killing the game.

It's 2.2 for me, so "poor".

Flip-screen maze walker. Not bad, not good. Ideal average.

I may be in a very good mood today, but… hey, i really got some fast fun from this game! Yes, there is nothing special there, and collision detection is not the best one, but it was fun for a little. So 2.8, which is rounded to "average".

I don't know why people are bashing this game so hard. For me, it is fun. Mostly due to the "explore" mode, where you won't die when your energy runs out. I even see some ugly appeal in the game graphics.

Of course, it is mostly wandering around without a goal, but isn't it what our lives are after all?

Solid "average" for me. Dunno why.

P.S.: I prolly need some help adjusting my crap-o-meter.

It's Defender. And it sucks so hard that you prolly can clean your room with a physical copy of it.

Terrible scrolling, terrible speed, terrible game. No graphics can save this. It is just poor.

Hold down "fire" button, and enjoy The Endless Journey. No enemies or obstacles will appear if you will simply keep shooting, and the game will never ends.

"An audio visual magic game", as the game says about itself. Only there is no magic in it, at all. Boring two-player-only shoot-each-other game without anything that could make it stand out of the crowd.

The first level is so boring that I couldn't even finish it. Graphics is dull, there are no nasties to entertain you, and your ball is square. Added one point for a square ball, and it's 2 now, i.e. "poor".

This is mostly a puzzle game, with very small arcade element thrown in. You don't need lightning-fast reflexes to play this, but planning your route is vital for success.

Note that small colored platforms on the floor give you a kind of "key" of the same color. And you can only "carry" a one such "key".

Not a great game, but not a bad one too. Slightly above "average" for me.

Original Cerius wasn't good, and this isn't good too. Basically, all Show Brothers games are below average, but this one can't even climb up to 2.5 for me.

Slow, boring, with bad controls and unforgiving collision detection. There is nothing that could make you want to play it longer than 2 minutes.

"Jock and the Time Rings" (the prequel) was vad. This is slightly better, aroung 2.8. But don't think that it is so better that it is fun, because it isn't. If you want a good game, go play "Trapdoor" instead.

Despite the usual Show Brothers' problems with controls, this arcade adventure is strangely fun to play. It's not really a good game, but it is good for Show Brothers, hence the rating.

(Yes, I don't like Show Brothers' games, so I usually avoid reviewing them, except when I have at least something good to say.)

This is "Hypa Raid" (another Nigel game), only with even worser graphics and less playability (unforgiving collision detection doesn't help too). I'd recommend to try "Hypa Raid" instead of this.

This game lost the only thing that made the first one worth playing: Harry walking animation!

But I must say that this game does one thing many other games can't: when Harry walks into some obstacle, and you're keep walking in the same direction, Harry tries to move sideways instead of stucking in place. This bumps the game from "awful" to "poor".

Barry Jones seems to be the man who made (almost) endless runners, walking simulators and open world sandboxes way before all other world even thought about such genres. If only he could execute his ideas properly…

Don't be fooled, this game is as far from being playable as most other Barry games, but I simply cannot mark it as "poor" or "awful". I wonder what could happen if Barry ideas would be picked up by some competent programmer…