Producer: Applications
Memory Required: 48K
Retail Price: £5.50
Language: Machine code

One of the odder game's newly available at the 9th. ZX Microfair was this adventure offering from Applications. You take the part of the Prime Minister's husband, Denis Thatcher. The story starts off in a cosy den at Number 10, safe from Maggie's eye, where you can plan your getaway, and drink the cellar dry.

All the descriptions of locations are rendered in rhyming from like this, which makes for some very amusing and wry comments on political life in general. Your major problem is to find a drink, for this adventure is constructed so as to kill you off if you don't find one within ten moves, and reflects the general scenario that Denis must be got out of the house, avoid Maggie at all costs and finally reach the sanctuary of the Gravediggers Arms. If this sounds a little domestic, forget it. Denis Through The Drinking Glass is a tough assignment! Few adventurers will have encountered a monster as fearsome as the Iron Lady:

An icy blast,
An icy stare,
Abandon hope,
Maggie's there.
Sit you down,
Be a peach,
Listen to
The latest speech.

The game incorporates a number of features common to many 'modern' adventures, like the problem of ensuring that you are clothed. Exiting through the front door without having adjusted your clothing first will result in the friendly policeman handing you a copy of the SUN newspaper with your portrait fully nude on the front page - end of game! The HELP facility can be as capricious in its clues as any. At one point, when asked, it said, 'Get knotted'.

This turned out to be less than first thought when sheets were discovered under a bed, that could be knotted to act as a rope thrown through the window (mind you, that didn't work). On another occasion it merely replied, 'Balls!'. Again, this turned out to be more helpful than one might suppose and seemed to tie in with the existence of plus-fours, golf clubs and the ever helpful policeman who has something for your leisure and pleasure - balls perhaps?

I must confess, at this point, that I have managed to explore some of Number 10 but not much more, it's going to take a lot longer! But Denis Through The Drinking Glass is a delightful game, so spending a great deal more time on it won't be any bother. The wit of the game and it's detective-like qualities combined with that damned 10 moves before a drink restriction make it thoroughly addictive and fun to play. If this is remotely near the truth then poor Denis must lead a miserable life. In search of that elusive gin bottle I noted the 'volume out of place' in the bookshelves very early on, but it only turned out to be Kropotkin's Memoirs (or is that a clue - I'll have to go back and try again)? Other points worth passing on are; don't try jumping out of the window - it gives the SUN another headline picture, 'Denis pays a flying visit to the garden', the painting by Churchill looks interesting but the description wryly says, 'Nice canvas, pity about the paint', the cheese is dangerous, what's a PURDY (?), and Maggie can be lured away from her den and out of the house. Once out of the political confines of Number 10 there are obviously a lot of other famous souls to meet and avoid.

The game has been written with Gilsoft's excellent QUILL utility, a fact which is stated at the very start. 'I also see - A PLUG' it says under the acknowledgement. I wasted precious time trying to do something with that wretched plug before I realised it was a joke. Very funny.

The response times are infinitesimal, in fact when you get into the rhythm of repeating moves you already know, it's possible to type in as fast and continuously as the keyboard will allow. Very worthwhile, entertaining and challenging. I can recommend Denis - even if Maggie can't.

COMMENTS

Graphics: text only, uses full width and height of screen
Sound: entry clicks

Producer: Applications, 48K
£5.50 (3)

If mythical dragons have become the bane of your life, try pitting you wits against a real monster in this compelling, witty and difficult game. You must guide Denis Thatcher through life, avoiding the icy blast of Maggie as she prepares another Prime Ministerial speech at Number 10. Denis just wants to get out to his favourite pub, the Gravediggers Arms, but Maggie's in the way and Denis has a severe drinking problem - if he doesn't get a slug of gin within 10 moves, he's as good as dead. Location descriptions are all rendered in rhyme and tend to offer a jaundiced view of political life. Early attempts at escape may well end up with you photographed on the front doorstep of Number 10 nude - did you forget to get dressed! Finding the gin is a tough assignment and the HELP facility only tends to be helpfully rude. A prompt of 'BALLS!' turns out to refer to the golf balls which you have forgotten, and 'Get Knotted' suggests that sheets may make a rope. You're not likely to get bored, but there's always a volume of Kropotkin's Memoirs to while away a few seconds between dying for a lack of gin. Very fast responses with this Quill-written game, and highly recommended. Overall CRASH rating 83%, machine code.

WHAT'S YOURS BILL?

Make sure a bottle of gin is to hand if you sit down to play Denis through the Drinking Glass, for you are only allowed 10 moves without having a snifter. And to do that you must find the flask...!

That is the first problem. But you may not find it quickly enough, because Maggie has a habit of catching up with you first to try out one of her speeches on you. You could end up bored to death!

This game is a topical political satire, written mainly in verse, and available for the Spectrum. Just because it is fun - especially if you list to port! - don't be fooled into expecting it to be easy!

I am dying to have a go at Mary Whitehouse, give the women of Greenham Common a pat on the back, to get one up on Maggie (will I succeed without a bullet-proof vest?) and eventually reach the sanctuary of the Gravedigger's Arms to drink the cellar dry - my objective!

But at the moment I'm still cowering in the cupboard under the stairs, away from the Iron Lady's clutches, trying to discover what a purdy is. When she clears off, I will steal into her boudoir and see if I can filch some of her gin. Maybe I'll find a washer for her dripping tap.

I did once try a swift exit from the front door, but became a national headline: "Denis poses for Sun readers outside No. 10" (end of game). Whoops! I had forgotten to dress!

The author claims he is unlikely to be awarded an OBE, and is anonymous. Could it be Jasper Carrott?

For those who enjoy satire and poking fun at the Establishment, here's a game that's certain to please.

Denis Through the Drinking Glass is innocuously packaged in an ordinary cassette case with a fairly uninteresting inlay. The game belies the packaging!

Although hard to solve, Denis is easy to play, with one of the fastest responses I've yet seen in a Spectrum Adventure. Interestingly, it is written using the Quill. Under the titles is your first object - A Plus!

Denis Through the Drinking Glass is for the 48k Spectrum, price £5.50 from Applications.

MACHINE: Spectrum 48K
JOYSTICK: No
CATEGORY: Adventure
SUPPLIER: Applications
PRICE: N/A

You've read the Private Eye letters, you've seen the West End comedy, now play the adventure.

Yes, you guessed. This program takes the national pastime of lampooning the prime minister's husband to new depths.

Playing the part of Denis Thatcher, your mission is to escape from Number Ten Downing Street and reach a pub called the Gravediggers Arms.

As in all adventures you're in search of treasure while trying to avoid nasties. But in this game the treasure is drink of any kind, and the principal appears to be Maggie herself.

Other characters in the game include Ian Paisley, the Pope, Dennis Skinner and members of the Royal Family whom the cassette label advises you to treat with care.

There are no graphics, but the text describes the different locations in alluring, humourous rhyme.

What happens to you can be fairly funny as well. If you find your way out of the front door, the game immediately ends your mission by displaying a headline on page 3 of the Sun, because although you didn't know it, you weren't wearing any clothes. Next time you put on a suit first.

My criticism is you can't just sit around experimenting with different commands, you actually have to keep making progress. And my prediction is that once the novelty wears off, the game itself is not all that wonderful.

HALF DRUNK ALL THE TIME

MICRO: Spectrum 48K
PRICE: £5.50
FORMAT: Cassette
SUPPLIER: Applications Software Specialists, 8 St Paul's Road, Peterborough

The Quill is a marvellous utility, allowing someone with no programming skill at all to produce professional quality machine-coded adventure games. One of the first commercial fruits of this admirable skeleton program is Denis through the Drinking Glass, an adventure in which you play Denis Thatcher, the Premier's consort who is about to embark on a holy quest for the mythical Gravedigger's Arms.

No, don't get your hopes up! There's nothing faintly mythic or mystic about this game. It's just a weak political satire set in contemporary Britain, peopled by politicians and public figures like "Woy" Jenkins and the Greenham Common Women instead of dragons and trolls.

It's not a bad idea, and there's plenty of scope for an author of wit and imagination to cut loose. Indeed Denis shows quite a lively sense of humour and forced a grin or two along the way. All things being equal, I was quite looking forward to a change from spaceships, dungeons and monster-bashing.

But all things aren't equal. In this game they are balanced overwhelmingly against the player., At the start you find yourself in Denis's study at Number 10, disturbingly equipped with bed and wardrobe as well as bookcase and desk. The room descriptions are entirely in verse. Bad verse. To call it doggerel would be to underrate the poetic abilities of the average Yorkshire terrier. Still despite this, and the occasional spelling error, a certain atmosphere is created, mostly one of paranoia and oppression.

EXAMining the wardrobe was useless, but I found out eventually that LOOK WARDROBE did the trick. Clumsy, but I could live with it. Not so the endless ways to die... well, nothing quite so dramatic, but still the end of the game. Meeting Maggie, stepping into the street without due thought for one's personal appearance, sneaking out, meeting a policeman - all meant starting again. A challenge is one thing, but this was attrition!

Still, using the Quill's built-in save option even this could have been overcome, if it wasn't for the author's piece de resistance. I can almost imagine him cackling with glee when he came up with the idea. Denis, you see, has a drink problem. He can't function without alcohol. To play at all you need to keep him perpetually tipsy... and in this game "tipsy" has a very precise meaning indeed. If Denis takes a drink too many he's drunk - end of game; if he waits too long between drinks he sobers up - end of game. There are no messages to warn you this is about to happen. Denis must drink every tenth move, no sooner or later, so you must note down every input as you enter it.

Boring, awkward and infuriating. It adds that final touch of unplayability to an already difficult game. And since Denis's trusty flask is well-hidden, getting started at all is a major achievement.

To be honest, if I hadn't been able to run this game through my own copy of the Quill to see how it worked and then edit out the bits that make it unplayable, I'd never have seen enough to review! If you have the Quill you might find this program interesting (it's certainly bizarrely constructed) - otherwise only for those with the patience of a saint.